On the fourth floor, a woman with elegant makeup and a parrot on her shoulder strode into the elevator and stood by Sydney.

"Jackass," the parrot said pleasantly. Its beady black eye met Sydney's. "Jackass," it repeated, as if expecting a response.

A delivery man was waiting on the fifth floor. He wheeled in a cart that held a wooden box shaped like a coffin. The delivery man turned the cart around and backed up to stand in front of Sidney. Sidney yelped involuntarily as the man stomped on his feet.

"Move it!" the delivery man demanded.

"I was here first!" Sidney snapped.

"Jackass," said the parrot.

----from The Presentation, Trapped Inside the Maelstrom: Tales of Horror and Madness